This is a photograph of my brother Kenny and me. We’re in my mother’s Chevy Impala with our Standard Poodle puppy, Caesar. The year is 1959, and so that makes me almost ten and Kenny almost six.
Fred and Adele Astaire Sidebar: Even though Adele was the older of two famous siblings, her younger brother Fred always gallantly maintained the fiction that he was the elder. Over the years, Kenny has tried to say that we are the same age – or that he is older. Sadly, I got the lousy toss of the genetic dice.
Here’s an updated photo of the one above.
That’s us this past Fourth of July. Notice who got ALL the gray hair. (That is if my clingy Polo nautical top- making me look much more voluptuous than I am IRL- doesn’t divert your gaze from my head.)
Hard to pass for the younger sibling these days. Plus Kenny never changes. He is preternaturally youthful. In everything.
Long-times readers and FOK’s (“Friends Of Kenny”) already know about his love of sports. Especially baseball. At sixty plus, he is still competing in national hardball tournaments from Arizona to Florida.
Athletics might be his long suit. But school? Um…not so much.
Kenny never liked to read. It meant sitting still in one place, usually indoors, for far too long a time. Besides, he has always used books for bases.
One day while he was in elementary school, our mother was flabbergasted when stopped by the librarian.
Librarian: Kenny was in the library ALL day today, Mrs. Roffe.
My Mother (shocked) : He was?
Librarian: Yes, he was fixing the shelves.
And if he couldn’t sit still long enough to read, forget writing. I was the go-to on all his homework. Please see my post Ghost if you don’t believe me.
Hey, a guy can’t be expected to be good at everything. And if Kenny was more drawn to the roar of the playing field than the silence of the ivory academic tower, so be it.
After all these years, I’m used to thinking of him as Luis Aparicio. Not Luis Borges.
But lately, Kenny has exhibited a a talent that I had no idea he possessed.
He’s proven himself to be a gifted writer.
In emoji.
You know, those little pictures that come on your iPhone. Like this:
And these:
Kenny has been communicating with me through these cunning little devils lately and his messages are just great.
To be fair, Kenny started with simple emoticons.
Like this 🙂
Or 🙁
But you have to walk before you can run, and through practice, he’s blossomed into a talented author.
It would be plagiarism to print some of his more pithy texts. But here’s an example of Kenny’s brilliant emoji work.
Just last summer, when he watched the Cubs, I got this text novella:
Or after the latest annoying conversation with our mother- a ninety year old hardcore gambler who still goes to the casino every day- this is the four character play I received:
Can you see what he means? Simple, yet eloquent. Wish I could do that.
Gosh darn it, that kid has talent.
When it comes to emoji-writing, he’s gifted, my friend.
He may look like pre-crazy Tom Cruise, but he acts like Dustin Hoffman.
I think he’s a savant.
And I bet there’s a book in him, after all.
Hey, FOK’s. Does anybody have the emoji for “agent?”
Text me.
Ellen, I think that you wrote this post while under Cruise control.
🙂
🙂 Thanks!!! Feel free to add some witty but not overly wordy comment for me. Some things never change!
I never tamper with works of genius. 🙂
Is there an emoji for a swimming pool? Because I’d send it and the electric plug to the jerk who fired me four days before Christmas while my family was in Florida on the vacation I couldn’t take. He used to swim at the Standard Club, and I once asked one of the guys if there was a small electrical appliance I could toss into the pool while he was swimming.
I like it, Fred! You are really in the swim of things here today. And that guy sucks. 🙁
Ellen, you really burst my bubble. I didn’t know Kenny wasn’t a great student. When Kenny and I were at camp, I thought he liked Playboy for the in depth articles!!
As a post script…I know I’m getting old. In your fourth of July picture above, all I saw was the food!! Ok, I went back and looked at the pic again. I guess you both look good. But those ribs….
LOL, Steve. Yes, he was picked for Collegiate Week based on his Stanford-Binet tests. I didn’t have the ribs. I had a hot dog. But Kenny said they were good. Thanks for playing today. Wish I was there. I could use a little SoCal right about now. 🙂
I looked Ellen but cannot find an emoji for Dorian Gray or even Oscar Wilde…still there’s something going on with that bro of yours. Maybe he lost a fiddle dual in a Charlie Daniels sequel but did earn a wish. Still, hard to begrudge such a good guy.
Thats what I have long suspected. Kenny never ages. There must be a creepy, wrinkled portrait in an attic somewhere. Maybe camp Ojibwa’s Cabin 12- if it has an attic. Thanks, Gary. 🙂
Ellen,
As I suggested six months ago, you’ll look younger with that haircut I loved on you. Believe me!!!
The big secret to being able to play ball at 60+ is to NEVER stop. Barry Feldman and I get into pick-up basketball games on Saturday’s with kids anywhere from 16 to 25 years old. Feldman is 61 and I’m 71. We still got it!
Yes, visiting Ojibwa on an annual basis is also a potion for keeping young.
Another secret??? Keep those Sinatra and Edyie Gorme records spinning.
I actually considered it, Bernie, but I was out-voted. My current hair-albeit gray- has to remain at this length. Experts thought I’m too old to carry off the short pixie cut. But as you know, I visit Ojibwa and maybe that’s why I don’t look a hundred!
Yes to Frank. Edye? Not too often. But, thanks, Bernie. In the words of Ol’ Blue Eyes, “You’re young at heart.” 🙂
I found occasion to explore the erotic possibilities of emoticons (”eroticons”?) the other year, and managed to pantomime, or whatever you call it, a number of acts and sentiments in relatively understandable form. But the possibilities are limited, and no one has seen fit to supply an app that makes this easier. If I knew how to program, I’d do it. Has to be money in it. I therefore applaud Kenny’s very understandable emotiphrases.
Wow! “Eroticons.” (I had to be very careful how I spelled that. There is almost an anagram in there.) Spicy food for thought this time of the evening, John. Thanks. 🙂
Slightly off-topic, I know, but you referenced MooMoo above and I have to say that that was my very favorite of your postings – sad, poignant, and yes, funny. And the photo of your mom is haunting! Everyone should read it: MooMoopalooza, 16 October. Brava!
And, Kenny – you’re the bomb!
Thanks, Julie. Glad you enjoyed it. My mother was something else. Good and bad- we shall never see her like again. Happy holidays! 🤠